Since moving to Riyadh, I have been having the worst PMS imaginable. It is unbearable. A week before my period I start to feel like I'm getting sick, like my stomach has been replaced by a bottomless pit, and am overcome by horrible feelings of being overwhelmed. Oh and let's not forget the extreme anxiety, the rage directed towards my husband, the uncontrollable crying, and of course how I suddenly turn agoraphobic. It lasts the entire week prior to my period and the entire 9 days of my period and it is pure hell! I have always had pretty bad pms...but this is just cruel.

I mentioned it to my mom, and she mentioned that it sounds a lot like PMDD...WHAT?! There's a name for this hell I have been going through? It's not just PMS?! So I look it up and it matches nearly everything I have, except in the symptoms they say it starts the week before your period and ends once your period begins...that's not the case with me. I have two weeks of pure hell...

Since researching it, I've also noticed that I have a tendency to become incredibly sad and miss a certain person a lot more than I normally do. And do incredibly stupid things...and act like I'm living in a freaking romantic drama... blah. Then when the two weeks of hell are over I sit in shame and just want everything to go back to normal...

:|

I found a group on facebook (thank god for facebook) and the posts were like I had written them myself. One was by a husband concerned for his wife and the way he described his wife it sounded like me...well almost like me...this woman obviously has more issues than just severe pms..or pmdd.

I took a deep breath and sent a post and asked if pmdd can be triggered by an emotionally unhealthy living situation...I should explain why I ask that. End of December, we took a family trip to London and my period came and went with none of the anxiety or other awful symptoms I have recently started to have. Then the next month, back in lovely Riyadh..all the symptoms were back again.

There was a resounding YES! If you have a stressful living situation then it can trigger PMDD. Great! Just fucking wonderful...how do I fix that?!

So I'll be doing lots of research and hopefully will be going to see a doctor in the summer....because I don't trust doctors here...majority of them are incompetent morons who would have had their licenses revoked if they worked in the States.

This past month many of my worlds have been colliding. Everyone seems to know everyone else...and that makes me want to sit huddled in a corner, hiding. I still remember the first time I realized how small the world is. I had just moved to Saudi Arabia, left my American world and friends behind and started at a new school. A few weeks in we were getting a new student...turned out to be a girl who went t my school in the states. Imagine my surprise! I was amazed..and thought it the coolest thing in the world. Then a few weeks later we realized a girl in our class was related to one of our mutual friends in America...again amazed!! Then a few months later one of my friends was showing me family pictures and I recognized a girl to be one of my younger sisters friends from the States. Turns out that was my friends cousin.

I held onto this story, and told it over and over again to anyone who would listen. It was my favorite story to tell, because I thought it was simply amazing.

So as I was saying lately this has been happening again..people I know suddenly knowing other people I know. This time around I don't find the smallness of the world amazing or cool...I find it suffocating, stifling, heart breaking.

I find myself having trouble breathing..feeling perpetually panicked..and I realize its because I keep thinking about how small this world is. I blame globalization, screw those people who came up with it. Everyone should have just stayed within their borders and minded their own business. Oblivious to what was happening in the world around them...that's the world I want to live in. Where there is no risk of my American friends knowing my Saudi friends. And when you travel, no one will ever hear from you again; unless you travel back or write a letter. I also hate technology. I always wanted to live in Jane Austen's time period...be Elizabeth Bennett, but I felt I could never survive without technology.

Technology, along with the shrinking world we live in, has been adding to the suffocating feeling. I hate it, so yes please send me back to a time where facebook, email, and whats app did not exist. Where instagram and its taunting pictures are not even an idea yet.

Then again, I think its age that makes the world shrink. Age and awareness or something like that. Which makes me come to the conclusion that death is indeed a blessing...however it can't come soon enough. First you must be tormented by life, until you are not merely wishing, but begging on your hands and knees for yours to be taken away.

This post was inspired by this random thought I had, and whats apped to my sis: As I age, the world which seemed big, intimidating, and full of hope begins to shrink.With each passing day, it shrinks more and more and I am finding it harder and harder to breathe. The world shrinks and I slowly suffocate...death is a mercy for people unable to cope in this shrinking world. Yet even death cannot come quick enough.

Where are you?

I am at the edge of a cliff contemplating staying or falling.
I am at a dead end street conversing with the fences and walls.
I am in an abyss, clawing, grasping, hoping for something to hold on to.

Where are you?

I am in the middle of a lake in a leaky boat.
I am drowning an an ocean of regrets and sorrow.
I am in a whirlpool, spinning, coughing, losing breath.

Where are you?

I am alone in a dark room.
I am crying for the past.
I am sad, lonely, lost.

You know how there are some books that start their chapters off with a relevant quote? Well a book I'm reading on and off does that, and the last chapter I read started off with this quote:

"When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability... To be alive is to be vulnerable."
                                                                                                                   -Madeleine L'Engle

Now, I've never read A Wrinkle in Time. I tried..numerous times as a kid, and I tried even harder when my younger sister read it and loved it..but it never interested me. I was at a stage in life where I preferred mysteries and autobiographies. I know...what kind of kid prefers to read autobiographies?! Seeing this quote, made me remember the book seeing as it was said by the author.

When I saw this quote...it moved me. Lately I have been feeling lost, alone, confused...and kind of like a little kid playing dress up. I have no clue what I'm doing, how can I be a mother? How can I be an adult when I still feel so much like a child. So vulnerable. Reading that quote was just what I needed..because it's so true.

You spend your childhood feeling scared and unsure...knowing that once you get older you'll be invincible. You'll have all the answers....you get a little older and start to feel slightly less confident about knowing everything but are still hopeful that maybe you just need a little more time. Then you get married, you have kids and are faced with the harsh reality that no one gave you the answers you were supposed to get. And you realize that your parents who always seemed so on top of things are sometimes just as lost as you. And it's scary...

To be alive is to be vulnerable. I love it...and it somehow makes things better. I want to paint this quote on my wall..so that every morning I can wake up and see it. I know...that's cheesy. But whatever!

Also...I think I may give A Wrinkle in Time another try...I mean why not right? :D

One of the things I love most about my boys is that they don't follow the rules. I mean, yeah it can be a pain in the ass, but it also allows them to show their creative side. For example, we went to a Christams-y type event with a bunch of arts and crafts activities for kids. One of the activities was to make a greeting card, and they had a sample card showing you how it should look, and a baggy filled with all the supplies you needed. So OS and I got to work, and I showed him that what we would have to do to make the card. He brushed me off and said "I'm not making a card like that. I'm making it my way." My first instinct was "No, this is the way the card has to be made", but I stopped myself and thought about. Why does it have to be made that way?! So I let him make his card his way and it turned out beautiful.

At another station you could color wreaths, so my YS who's is only 3, was scribbling away...not bothered with coloring in the lines. Also his color of choice was black. So he was happily making a big black scribble all over his wreath when the helper came over and said let's try using a different color and coloring in the lines. I told her he's only three, and she said well he can try! It annoyed me...he will eventually learn to color in the lines just like his brother did. And if he wants to color the entire wreath black who are you to tell him he cant?! Yes, it may not be festive and cheerful but it's his wreath, his choice and who is she to judge if that's right or wrong?

Then yesterday we were drawing Christmas trees at home, and my OS wanted me to make one with him. So I obviously colored my tree all green, glued some pipe cleaners on the tree to look like trimming and some glitter to look like lights. I looked over at my OS who's tree was a mixture of peach, blue, green, pink, purple, orange and light blue. To me, it wasn't a tree, and he looked over at mine and asked, "Why did you only use green? Why didn't you make it colorful?" as if I was wrong to color a tree green. It made me smile, and when I asked him if he wanted to glue pipe cleaners on his he replied, "No, if I do that you wont be able to see my coloring."

I think its great that they are able to think outside of the box.

I haven't been feeling so great the past few months. That's really an understatement...but I have a few more funny kid sayings from my boys..

OS: YS did you know if something comes close to your eye it will close? Here let me show you. *shoves cocoa puff near YS's eye, nearly poking him* See? Your eye closed.
YS tries the same thing to his own eye: Oh yeah!

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

YS: Sorry I ate McQueen's eyes Mommy. He's sleeping that's why I ate his eyes.

Clever boy 

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

YS: Mommy, your phone has no data. It's taking really long time to load.
Me: Patience, YS. We need to wait patiently like a big boy.
YS: No. If it takes long time I'm going to die and then I won't give you hugs anymore.
Me: You also won't be able to watch the video if you die.
YS: But I won't give you any hugs anymore and I'll die.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

I was laying on the floor, and OS hopped onto my back "giving me a massage". All of a sudden YS jumps onto OS and starts jumping. OS laughing says, "Mommy, you're the horse, I'm the saddle and YS is the rider."

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Me: YS do you want mayonnaise on your sandwich?
OS: I hate mayonnaise!
YS: No thank you. I don't hate mayonnaise, I just don't like it when the cat eats it.
Me: Oh...okay.
YS: Yeah, when the cat eats the mayonnaise I don't like it.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

  

the first cut is the deepest...and the hardest to heal

An ache in my heart..an emptiness in my soul.
Stuck looking back, watching reruns of my life.
It feels so real.
I'm slowly breaking inside.
Every time I pick up the pieces, and start closing the door,
Fear overcomes me.
I fling it back open, and drop whatever pieces I had begun to glue back together.

You broke me in so many ways, more than I ever knew,  and more than I ever will know.

My amazing sister came up with (or rather stole) a great idea of taking all my funny stories and sayings and making it into a book. And now that I think about it...I think my mom might have suggested the same thing a few months back. Well whatever...I got inspired (or re-inspired) to collect all the funny things they do and say and the easiest place to keep them is here...on my blog.

So this will be a post of copy/pasting a few facebook statuses...is that the plural of that word? It just sounds so wrong!

soooo I was going to copy paste stuff...but my god! tooooo much work. so instead i'm off to google ways to collect all my facebook statuses and print them out and highlight the ones i want. :D

I haven't posted in a while, but after nearly three months out of Riyadh...we're back! The exclamation point is to try and get myself happy about being here. But a week in and I want to sit in a corner and eat and cry until I either explode or shrivel up. *sigh* Anyways..no need for depressing stuff I have a few cute stories about my boys.

So today I found mold in my washing machine...disgusting I know, but I swear it was not my fault! The washer doesn't properly drain and then the water pools there, and my wonderful husband kept the washer door closed for three months. I leave it open so it can dry out..hence the mold. Anyways..I found it and immediately started scrubbing....while scrubbing my oldest came and asked me if he could watch leap frog on netflix. he got the idea because he found his leap frog alphabet toy. I told him sure, to just give me a minute, and then he walked out and I overheard the following conversation between him and his brother:

Older Son: Hey! You wanna come watch me draw letters on my leap pad?
Younger Son: OK.
OS: Hey YS, do you know what they call "Z" on this?? They call it Zed...it's not "Z" it's Zed. Isn't that funny?

Then they both sit laughing. Anyone reading this might be thinking why on earth is she sharing this...but it was the sweetest most adorable exchange ever. Granted 15 minutes later OS started punching YS because I told OS he could have water instead of another chocolate milk. :/ So these sweet moments are precious.

Earlier today, while driving to school, YS suddenly looks at me and heres how the conversation went:

YS (horrified expression on his face): EEEEEEWWWWWW?
Me: What?
YS (still horrified and now slightly disgusted): EEEEWWWWWW!!! Is that YOU?
Then he grabs the collar of his shirt and lifts it to cover his nose, looks at me and says "Gross!"

I died laughing...because one I had just showered, two I didn't do anything, and three he just looked so cute and adorable. Needless to say my laughing was a horrible idea..because the rest of the ride I had both boys looking at me repeating the convo over and over and giggling.

I seriously wished that children came with a mute button...even though they were incredibly cute mashallah.

Yesterday, was OS first day of KG1, and after picking him up he started telling us about his day. Back story, after dropping him off in the morning we stopped by another school that would accept our YS into pre-k and stayed there for all of 15 minutes. So back to the story...OS is telling us about his day what he did...and the YS interrupts and says " I had fun day at my kool. I played wiv my frieeeeends......etc. etc." <3 p="">
Day before yesterday...I was buying both boys a gift for staying in their beds all night...we are going through sleep training her at my house because I am sick of sharing my bed. If I can't get me time during the day ... then please god at least let me have my bed at night! Oh..and technically OS should not have gotten a gift...because he wakes himself up every hour to make sure we are still sitting in his room which we obviously are not...and then comes into our room..wakes up my husband and gets walked back into his room...only to do it again either after an hour or if its really bad every 20 minutes. :| YS is much better...probably because he's younger. Anyways I digress...

So OS bought a beyblade and asked can we please skype with your brothers? I have to show them my new powerful beyblade!

YS then says he too wants to skype and this is the conversation he said he was going to have:

"They gonna ask me, what you have? And I going be like Tow Mater. And they going be like Where you buy it from? And I gonna be like from da tore!"

The facial expressions and tone accompanying that was priceless.

in other non-kid related news...in May I sent an email to the community center informing them that the child play area smelled like cigarettes, and that it turned out the attendants were smoking there and that they were told it was ok to smoke there. I then proceeded to write that i felt it was outrageous to allow smoking in a children's area. I never received any type of response. Today I get a call from on the attendants. I should mention one of them took my number and said we should hang out (not in a million years) and the other one was the one who called today. Anyways...she called asked how I was then said "Can I ask you a question and I hope you don't get upset" Of course I started feeling nervous...but I said yeah of course.
She was like did you send an email about us smoking?
I acted like I didn't hear...then after she asked three more times I said a long time ago yes...why? She's like no not a long time ago .. like two days ago. I said no I never sent anything two days ago..Then she said someone came and talked to them and told them there had been a complaint about them smoking...and she was like the only people there two days ago were you and the new muhajjab lady. So it had to be one of you too...
I told her that no I never sent anything in the past few days...like I said I only sent something a while ago when the entire play area smelled like smoke...but recently I have not sent anything.

Then she said something along the lines of theres the issue of getting fired. I told her I didn't understand..which to be honest I didn't...the convo was in arabic...and I wasn't sure if she was saying they got fired or they could get fired.

I've been thinking about the convo all day long, and heres my thoughts. 1. completely unprofessional of her to call me and ask that. 2. completely unprofessional of the community center to tell her we've had a complaint when they know very well there are maybe 3 people who regularly visit the childrens area and thats being generous. 3. who the hell does she think she is calling me and setting the tone of i know it was you. f you! I have every right to call and complain if something is not right. and I'm sorry but why is there the risk of being fired?? i remember when I asked if you were smoking you told me they said it was alright....soo whats the issue? Me complaining should have not been an issue if you were in fact telling the truth.

And now I feel like I can't visit the play area in the mornings anymore if they still are working there. *sigh*

I'm feeling like writing so maybe there will be more posts...maybe not. who knows.

If you really take the time to think about life, spend time flipping through old notes and pictures, you'll realize how sad life really is. Not just sad, but downright depressing.

Maybe I'm just in a sad mood, but I was just browsing my facebook posts from 9 years ago (which is this genereation's equivalent of looking through a scrapbook or photo album)..9 YEARS!!...and got really really sad. There were posts from people who I no longer speak to, not because I chose to but because life decided that persons time in my life was up. And it hurt my heart..because reading those posts I can barely even remember being with that person. Sharing with them and caring about them are memories so far gone, it's almost hard for me to believe that we ever were once that close.

I look at old pics and then the mirror and am shocked to actually see how much time has passed..to see the youth slowly but surely leaving me...slowly but surely becoming a full-fledged adult.

A few days ago I found out someone I knew got a divorce. For days now I have been feeling incredibly sad and depressed about it. Everyone gets divorced...why does it matter so much? I have no idea....but it left me heavyhearted.

And as I think about everything more and more it just becomes more clear how sad life is. How incredibly depressing our existence really is. We are born, and live only to die. Nothing matters...we are all going to die.

Just as friendships die, careers die, hopes, dreams, and ambitions die we will die. So why do I care so much?

Why does my heart ache over friendships that have slowly and suddenly withered away? Why do I despair over the divorce of people I barely know? Why do I worry about people who go out of their way to show me they don't care?

Why must I feel so much all the time? For once I'd like to feel nothing...no sadness, anxiety, moroseness, anger, hurt....just nothing. I'm tired of all these feelings rushing through me..these emotions leaving me paralyzed unable to move fully into the present and start heading towards the future.

Turning 27

So I was just getting ready to head to bed, when I hear a horrible crash, bang, thud...and then the sound of my four year old screaming out in pain. I rush to see blood dripping from his mouth...his nose all over the bedroom floor. I grab a washcloth and start dabbing his nose and applying slight pressure....no looking up or down for me. I'm a firm believer of not doing either..back will just make it pool inside and down won't do anything special.

I check his teeth, his tongue, his mouth, lips and nose for any serious injuries...al7mdulila there did not seem to be any. I check the rest of his head for any gashes or cuts that might need stitches...nothing thank god!

I try to keep him awake....scared of him getting a concussion or something. But he falls asleep and I worry if thats a bad sign. Then again is 2:20 am and any four year old would be falling asleep at this time. Bloody nose or not.

*sigh* being a mom is full of worries, stress and guilt.

I now have a mountain of pillows and comforters on his side of the bed so if he rolls off of bed again he won't hurt himself too badly...i hope.

He never falls out of bed at home...NEVER. But this mattress we're currently sleeping on..we're on summer vacation...is not the best mattress. It's a very cheap...i know that may sound snobbish..spring mattress. Even I almost fell out of bed twice already in the past two nights. I love laying on the edge and apparently my four year old does too. However with this mattress when you lay on the edge...it slants and creates a ramp that slowly slides you out of bed. I don't know if this is normal....but no other mattress I have slept on in the past 6 years has done that.

And since I have no one to blame I am blaming the mattress. But not without good reason...it really is an awful mattress.

And because when something bad happens you can't help but think of all the other things annoying you because obviously you need to be as miserable as possible...I am turning 27 on the 27th. My golden birthday..I wanted to do something special...a family lunch. But looks like thats not going to happen. First the country decides to change its weekend and make it effective two days after my birthday. Which means confusion and chaos the weekend of my birthday. Plus my dad decided that this would be the perfect time for a road trip...I don't want to, nor can I take a road trip. The road trip isn't for sure yet...but it might as well be. So I'm disappointed. yet again. I should be used to it though. The only good birthday I can remember having was when I finished 6th grade. I had a nice party with a few friends but even that was slightly disappointing seeing as the majority of people I invited ended up going to an end of the school year party set for the same day as my birthday by a more popular girl. But this was also the summer we drove across country and every stop I seemed to be able to get a birthday present. I don't think it really counts though since my sisters got to pick up a souvenir too at every stop. :/

Majority of my birthdays have been spent on an airplane. so i should be used to it by now. but i'm not. and i wanted something special this year...i really really did. for some reason my brain feels like 27 is a huge milestone. and i think i just wanted one day to be for me...to be about me. just one.

Letting out my frustrations..

Family is funny.. extended family that is, You can go an entire year or more hating them...dreading having to see them. Wishing they didn't exist..but then when you do meet up..feel happy that you have them. Today we met up with my aunt and her family and her new grandson...who is absolutely adorable mashallah!! And I was dreading it...dreading the lectures....the awkwardness...just all of it. But it was really nice..even though we didn't eat until 2 and I had a really light breakfast at 7 am, and when we did eat all they gave us was pizza. :| I understand my aunt can't cook because of her broken foot...but there are other things they could have brought other than pizza. Bleh!

I have to say....food wise..this vacation has not been good. It's been filled with cheese quesadillas and really gross leftover rice. :/ and now pizza oh well...thank god we have food to eat.


I still felt really happy and thankful and just so grateful for family. So grateful to have such an annoying clan who, though they can be annoying, rude, and sometimes mean, will always be there for me.

Anyways...while we were there, my sons started to get a little bored. My mom mentions that she brought some coloring books for them and asked if I'd like to give them to the boys now. I was thrilled! So we pull them out and they were really cool. I don't know if anyone remembers those water color books? The ones that had "magic pages" and all you needed was water and a paint brush??? Well these books were like that, except they had one of those magic markers with magic ink. Invisible on everything except the paper, and each section of the paper was a different color once you colored it. It was really cool! My two year old loved it..because he just scribbled away and was thrilled to see that his scribbling resulted in a beautiful picture. My four year old sat there for literally 2 hours coloring page after page after page. He was very precise, and made sure he was coloring inside the lines even though it didn't really matter much :D My brothers watched my boys color their first pages and then looked over to my mom and said.."did you buy any for us?" My mom and I looked at each other and were kind of shocked. They are 12 and 11...the 12 year old is headed to middle school. When my mom answered no...they both sulked and were really upset. The 12 year old kept telling my mom I cannot believe you didn't buy me one. The booklet says 3 and up....when my mom read that she laughed and said I guess they were serious about the up part.

Then the nanny brought out a bag of toys for my cousin's son who is one...so its a bunch of baby toys. My two year old who is still interested in baby toys...sometimes..was playing with the baby. My 11 year old brother grabs a toy and my son asks him if he can play with it. I feel like a normal response would be  to give the two year old the baby toy or start a game with the child. Instead he insists he was playing with the toy first and he shouldn't have to give it to the now crying two year old...or start a game with him. I mean seriously!?

This has become a venting post...so I might as well vent more frustrations towards this particular topic. My brothers and sons all wanted to box...and there are only two sets of boxing gloves. I suggested that each one gets one glove that way everyone can play. They were all playing fine and laughing...when suddenly my older son comes out on the verge of tears wearing no gloves. My younger brother follows him wearing both gloves. I quickly ask what is happening and he says that the older one of my younger brothers said, "It's not fair because I can't hit him hard so lets play by ourselves." In the middle of them playing..all of them together...nicely....laughing, having fun. And this is a constant theme with the 12 year old. He cannot for the life of him play nicely with younger kids. When he suggests they all play soccer he will take this as a time to show off his tricks and takes the game way to seriously. He has no idea how to interact with younger children.

Then theres the drama of every "injury" they get. I'm sorry but I'm  pretty sure a barefot two year old walking over your foot, by accident, does not warrant you collapsing to the floor grabbing your foot, gasping and informing everyone that your foot was just stepped on. Really? You are three times his size, 6 times his age, and he had no shoes on. You are going to seriously try and tell me that him walking over your foot caused you to have a limp?

Another incident. My youngest brother calls to me in a very annoyed voice, "Tell your son to stop stepping on my shoes, he's ruining them." When you hear that you assume that it must be something important...some kind of special shoe that will be deformed or ruined beyond repair by my two year old stomping all over it. So I ask him trying to stay as calm as possible what shoe my son is destroying. His answer??
"My flip flops." oh.my.god.

Even my dad...who really tries to take my brothers side burst out laughing at how ridiculous that was. Then my brother continues with, "You are going to owe me new flip flops if he ruins them."

What are you even supposed to say to that?!

Last but not least...and actually not really even last I'm just through with venting..is the incessant tattling and stupid stupid back handed comments. They are driving me insane! I'm dealing with a new phase of tattling with my 4 year old which I am hoping he will outgrow but looking at my brothers it seems that may not be likely. My god they tattle more than my four year old. " H did this to O" "O did this to H" and I'm just like...if they don't have a problem with it then I don't need to know!!!

I seem to remember being great with kids at age 12...and so were my sisters...well at least one of them. Maybe my memory is foggy....maybe its just true what they say...girls mature faster than boys. But whatever the hell it is...I am incredibly frustrated and really thinking that maybe an almost 3 month vacation with them was a horrible horrible idea. :|

Then there are the moments when they all play nicely and I'm like ok...why can't you be this way all the time?

In other news....I will be 27 in 3 days...less than 3 since its currently 11:35pm right now. Insane!!!!

Every summer or really anytime I get together with my family I always have my expectations crushed. I always expect this wonderful gathering, my brothers and sons playing nicely together..but that never happens. Instead its filled with my brothers crying. My brothers are 11 and 12...my sons 4 and 2.

Its the most ridiculous thing ever! Like seriously ridiculous....and it drives me insane. and I have no idea why I'm so surprised every time it happens.

You would think an 11 and 12 year old would be able to play nicely with two preschoolers, be old enough to have the understanding towards them that older people have. But nope!

Instead they use them as scape goats...blame EVERYTHING on them..even things that were not their fault.

Kids Say the Darndest Things

I decided that I had had enough of being scratched by my boys claws (I guess this is a Mommy Confessions post too!), and decided to cut their nails..FINALLY.

So I walked into the room they were sitting in and asked who's first, of course my oldest volunteered his younger brother. This is the conversation I had with my oldest while cutting his brothers nails:

OS: Mommy I wish YS had six hands.
Me: Six hands!!! Why?
OS: Because then it would be sooooo long and I could do lots of fun things.

took me a second to understand what he meant, until I realized the obvious. He wanted his brothers turn to be longer and the logical way to make that happen would be to give him more hands. It cracked me up, and I thought it was pretty clever thinking on his part. :)

In less than a month he's going to graduate from pre-k and start KG1. It makes me so sad...how is the little baby who grabbed my finger and looked up at me with his face covered by a huge pacifier already on his way to college?! Where did the time go??? *sigh*

I'm proud of him though and proud of myself for keeping alive this long. lol

A funny thing YS said on the way to school, just so he doesn't feel left out. :P

OS: YS is a stegasaurus, and i'm a t-rex.
YS: No I NOT! *funniest look ever* I blue banana.
OS: A BLUE BANANA *dies laughing*

It was the funniest convo ever. I love when they get along and make each other laugh. warms my heart.

Kid's Q & A

I found this on another blog, and thought I would do it with my oldest who is four. These are the answers he gave me. I tried with my youngest who is two and all his answers were cinnamon because he was eating cinnamon with apples.


What does Mommy always say to you?
"I love you"

What makes Mommy happy?"When I'm being good and when I'm being bad it makes you angry"

What makes Mommy sad?"I don't know"

How does Mommy make you laugh?"When you tickle me"

How old is Mommy?"9"

How tall is Mommy?
"Hand motion showing my height equal to his"

What doesn't Mommy like to do?"Not wake up"
(he means I hate waking up in the morning)


What is Mommy's job?"To keep me safe"

What is Mommy's favorite food?"The fish that I don't like"


How do you know Mommy loves you?"From my pictures"


With Baba

What does Daddy always say to you?"I love you"

What makes Daddy happy?"when i don't do something bad"

What makes Daddy sad?"I dont know"

How does Daddy make you laugh?"when he tickles me"

How old is Daddy?"Umm..64"

How tall is Daddy?
"Reaches his hands as high as he can"

What doesn't Daddy like to do?"Not wake up"

What is Daddy's job?"to keep me safe..no..uh..work"

What is Daddy's favorite food?
"the fish that i don't like"

How do you know Daddy loves you?
"umm. because he says i love you."

I've been back in Riyadh for what feels like weeks, when in reality it's only been a few days..2 days to be exact. *sigh* depression, resentment, anger, sadness, and all those other great emotions have come rushing back to me and its almost like the amazing week in Sri Lanka never happened. I don't feel refreshed and ready to conquer the world...I feel even more miserable. *sigh*

This isn't right...this is no way for people to live. Then I feel stupid because I am constantly being told what a great compound I live on, how awesome it is to have a golf course, bowling alley, etc., etc. but you know what?? all those people that keep telling me that can have all these great things. I will gladly trade places with them. Its like giving a hamster a running wheel and telling him now you can run!

Yes I have amazing amenities on the compound, and a lot of people would kill for that. But it doesn't make me any less trapped. It doesn't take away the fact that I can't leave. I am stuck on this compound seeing the same faces day in and day out, with no hope of leaving when I feel like it. If I do want to leave I have to schedule in a driver...schedules are hopeless with kids. Or I can wait for my husband who sometimes doesn't feel like leaving the house after coming home from work. So if I tell you how miserable I am do not judge me and tell me I have such amazing things available to me. I am entitled to my feelings and currently I am miserable...even with two swimming pools.

In other news, my sons have become obsessed with Dinosaur Train which is a really cool show that teaches them about dinosaaurs (duh!). Theres one dinosaur who's catch phrase is "I have a hypothesis",  and now my two year old and four year old are walking around telling me they have a hypothesis...which i find absolutely adorable! Especially since they pronounce it correctly AND use it correctly.

In crazy mommyland news, my youngest has been especially busy. The day after we got back to Riyadh he decided the best place to use the potty would be his bedroom closet. He took off his underpants in the kitchen, walked upstairs and sqautted in his closet. And then we were wonderfully surprised with a disgusting puddle of diarrhea. Yes, diarrhea...THANK GOD we have tile floors! Can you imagine that mess on carpeting! I think I would have cried.

Second story, he handed me his brothers toy airplane, dripping water, and proudly told me he washed it. Then I, being distracted and slightly confused thanked him. Until I realized he has no idea how to turn on the water so I quickly asked him how he washed the plane; silently praying he didn't use the toilet. He very very excitedly and proudly yelled out: "fish tank!" And I thought greeeaaaaat!!! nasty fish water. but my dad helped put things in perspective, because when I was telling him the story his guess was that my son peed on the plane and honestly that would have been a lot worse than dipping it in the fish tank.

Our poor fish though have been through so much because of this little boy. Last night i found a ball of cotton floating around their tank. and a few months ago play dough and the play dough can.

Our Week Vacation in Sri Lanka Part III

Day 7: Bentota, Sri Lanka & Columbo, Sri Lanka

We woke up to rain, and were so sad to think that we might miss out on a little more beach fun. :( We had breakfast and luckily the rain subsided and we were able to enjoy the pool and then the beach and then the pool again. It was still overcast but I actually prefer it to be cloudy when I'm at the beach so its not tooo hot. After getting our fill of beach and swimming we headed back to the turtle hatchery so my sons could hold the turtles one last time. They did not want to leave, but eventually we headed to Columbo. We took a driving tour around the city, and my husband stopped inside the biggest buddhist temple in Columbo. Once we had seen enough of the city we headed to our hotel room which had a view of the ocean and the parliament building. It was a very pretty view and was a nice hotel room to end our trip in. Not the prettiest of rooms but comfortable and clean.

Day 8: Columbo, Sri Lanka

Woke up super early, headed to the buffet and ate some breakfast and headed to the airport to catch our plane back to Riyadh. The end.

Some of the fruits we tried because I cannot for the life of me remember which day and when and where in the story it fits were mangosteen, jack fruit, dorian fruit, red bananas, lemon bananas, pineapple. The mangosteen was sooooooooo sweet! I loved it..reminded me a little of lychee fruit. Jack fruit I was not a fan of..apparently it is a fruit that grows to be over 20 kg or something like that...when it is smaller and "young" they use it as a vegetable in their curries and when it is big and ripe they eat it as a fruit. It had a weird texture and not an appealing flavor at all to me. My husband didn't mind it though. Red bananas tasted like normal bananas so I was disappointed, apparently red bananas are more rare there and are only used for special occasions. Lemon bananas were also just bananas to me...they had a stronger flavor I guess...maybe slightly tangy. But both were very good bananas and very flavorful. Pineapples were amaaaaaaazing!!! so so soooo good! Did not make my tongue itch at all...and pineapple nearly always makes my tongue itch. The last fruit...dorian fruit....was the most disgusting fruit I have ever had the displeasure of eating. First off the smell was absolutely rancid! It smelled like rotting, decomping, garbage filled with really old baby diapers...it was nasty! I don't know what compelled the sri lankans to even try eating something that smelled so awful even before cutting into the peel. I mean my motto is smells like trash not going into my mouth. Anyways...cutting into the peel to get the fruit lets out an even stronger even more horrible smell. I don't know why I ate it...probably because our tour guide swore that it smells horrible but tastes very good and sweet. Let me tell you...it did not taste good! It has a thin plasticy layer that gives it a slight bite...once you pop through that the inside is a creamy, custardy, cheesy texture. Taste-wise, first bite you think hmm okay...then as it sits in your mouth and you feel the texture of the first kind of crunchy bit mixed with the creamy weird texture of the inside fruit...its just plain nasty. My husband said it tasted like onion to him...I could kind of see how he would think that...but I can even find words to describe just how disgusting this fruit tasted. Everything about it was horrible...taste, smell, texture...EVERYTHING! And my tour guide bought a whole bag to take home too...so it sat in the car with us for a day. And our noses could not get used to the smell which led my husband to believe that the fruit is constantly giving off smell because otherwise our noses would have adjusted and we wouldn't even realize the fruit was in the car. And once the fruit was removed from the car there was still an after smell. It was probably the worst thing I have ever put into my mouth...right up there with ear wax...and I know everyone has tasted ear wax when they were little (it was an accident okay!)

As for foods I did like and eat nearly everyday I was there... string hoppers, coconut sambal, king coconut juice, dhal curry, and beef curry. YUUUUUUUM! My breakfast was string hoppers and coconut sambal nearly every day, sooo yummy! I need to learn how to make them!

But yes that is the end of our trip...and now I'm back in depressing Riyadh and hit full force with the depressing feelings, resentment, and anger at being a woman in Saudi Arabia.   

(I decided to break up this post into three parts since it looked like a college essay when I posted it all together)

Our Week Vacation in Sri Lanka Part II

Day 4: Kandy, Sri Lanka & Nuwar Eliya, Sri Lanka

This day was a tour Kandy day, and we just walked around a mall, and then walked the streets to see the little shops. Before the shopping though, our tour guide took us to a lookout point or whatever you want to call it where you could see all of Kandy. It was a breathtaking view of the city with a lot of focus on the lake. The street shopping reminded me a lot of the souks in Saudi Arabia, so aside from the slight difference in merchandise it wasn't too amazing. Still fun to walk around and be part of the city. When we tired of shopping our tour guide brought us to his home to meet his wife and kids. He had a 16 year old boy, a 12 year old boy, a four year old boy and a 3 1/2 year old girl. They were all very sweet, and the wife had made some food, and they had fruit (fruit is like very popular there), and they had fancy fizzy juice. It was sweet of them to host us. After the visit, we started our drive up the mountain to Nuwar Eliya. Along the way, we stopped for lunch at a hotel built practically right next to the waterfall. It was a humid yet gorgeous lunch, none of the restaurants we went to had air conditioning even in the hotels. They all seemed to think that sweating while eating spicy food was a great idea. NOT A GREAT IDEA! But after lunch we stopped by a waterfall and my boys and husband and tour guide all waded into the water. I chose not to because I did not want to be helped by the group of men standing there. However, after my husband, sons, and tour guide were in the water I realized staying by myself with the group of guys probably not the best idea. They kept saying things in Singalese (or Tamil not sure which language they were speaking), looking and me and laughing. They gave off a really sleazy vibe, and they kept getting closer and closer to me...as a group. They started talking to me and I did my best not to smile or be friendly at all because they were really really creeping me out. One guy took out his phone and asked if he could take a picture with me...I wanted to cry but emotionlessly said no. He asked again..one pic and I refused him a second time. Luckily my husband also felt uncomfortable as did the tour guide and the shortened their little wading adventure for me. Then off we went up the mountain passing the tea plantations. It was stunningly beautiful. Next stop was a tea factory. The building and everything inside was over 100 years old, and the same stuff used by the British who built it. The guy said they even used the same techniques and methods the British did to make their tea today...which I found pretty awesome. I'm a huge tea fan so this was just my cup of tea :P :P After buying 6000 rupees worth of tea we continued on up towards the hotel. When we arrived we were greeted with BEAUTIFUL, GORGEOUS weather...I was sooooo thankful not to feel the humidity although I had gotten used to it. Before arriving at the hotel we stopped so my oldest son could ride a horse/pony/wild horse then continued on to our hotel. When walked to our hotel room I was pleasantly surprised to see it was our own personal little cabin...walk inside and it was a bed and a loft with another bed. It was soooo cute and the view was amazing..looking straight onto the lake. We got settled then walked around the lake for a little bit and rented a peddle boat. It was dark though and my husband and sons were a little scared to be on the lake in the dark so we made it a short boat ride and headed back for dinner.

Day 5: Nuwar Eliya, Sri Lanka & Bentota, Sri Lanka

We decided that we wanted to spend a little bit longer in Nuwar Eliya instead of waking up and starting our ride to Bentota early, since the weather was gorgeous and we did not get to fully appreciate the city the day before. So we woke up, and enjoyed breakfast outside with our wonderful lake view. We even met a really nice couple with children close in age to our kids (though the parents looked at least 40). We walked down the entire pathway surrounding the walkable side of the lake, and then decided to have a family horse ride. I took the youngest with me on a horse and my husband to the oldest. I didn't actually ride the horse...I don't know how...a guy walked the horse while we sat on them...but it was still very fun, and made me want to learn to ride a horse even more. I think it would be amazing exercise. When the horse ride ended, we started put 6 hr drive to Bentota. We took one little break for bathroom and snacks near some river that was apparently in some british film that won a lot of awards call river something..and I just googled it. It was called: The Bridge on the River Kwai. Apparently it won a whole bunch of awards and our tour guide was like really proud that this river in Sri Lanka was part of the movie. The river was beautiful but I wasn't really interested in the fact that it had been featured in a movie. We were also supposed to go white water rafting down that river, but since we had the boys that was not an option and also part of the reason we chose to stay longer in Nuwar Eliya. We continued the drive and didn't arrive to Bentota until really late...8 pm. (thats really late in Sri Lanka). When we finally got up to our room...we were realllly disappointed. It was an oddly shaped tiny room with two twin beds. :| Also it was on the third floor at the end of a REALLY long hallway. To get to the beach or pool would be a nightmare with two little dawdling boys. So we called and asked if they had anything better...and they did have a room available on the ground floor that looked out at the pool, and had a walkout to the pool and beach. PERFECT! We changed rooms and to our relief this room had a king bed...a much better fit when its four in a bed. Also we could walk straight to the pool, and then from there to the beach without having to walk down an endless hallway, wait for an elevator, walk down another two hallways and out to the pool. AAAND we could easily get back to the room to change the boys into dry clothes. Much better fit for us. We ordered dinner and went to bed.

Day 6: Bentota, Sri Lanka

We woke up and spent the morning on the beach, and then the pool, and then had some lunch. The beach was sooo pretty, and the water was so clear and shallow for a good distance out which was great because it made it safer for the boys. The sand was so soft too...no shells in the water to hurt your feet. After lunch and a quick nap for the boys we headed to a turtle hatchery. There the boys got to hold turtle eggs, and baby sea turtles. They loved it and I have to say I really loved holding the turtles too! We also saw a few handicapped turtles they saved and Albino turtles which are apparently very rare the guy told us that from every 500,000 eggs, 1 or 2 will be an albino turtle. They keep the albinos and never release them because they are not safe (obviously) because they cannot blend in. When my son finally agreed to leave the turtles we went on a river safari. We saw a tiny little monkey which we were offered to hold, but decided against it. Next stop on the safari was the "fish market" Basically a little dock with large open sqaures holding HUUUGE doctor fish, and we were offered a foot massage by the fish. It cost us 200 Sri Lankan rupees each to sit and soak our feet with the fish...thats about $1.59!!! In the states to sit and have the tiny tiny fish nibble at your feet it cost waaaaaaay more than quadruple that amount! So I got a nice pedicure..too bad the fish can't polish my nails too. :( While soaking our feet my sons and husband held a baby crocodile..very brave little boys! Then we continued and my oldest son, 4 years old, drove the speed boat...almost crashing us into a mangrove! We safely arrived at a tiny island in the river that was home to a small Buddhist temple. We had a tour of the temple and at the end I asked the monk if he could read from their religious book. He looked very excited, i gues no one asks to hear a passage from the book, and read a little bit explaining what he had read. Then he proceeded to ask me if I had facebook and told me he had seen someone who looked just like me on facebook. Completely weirded out I backed out and headed back down to the boat. We drove through a mangrove and headed back to the dock to be taken back to our hotel. We had a horrible buffet dinner with RUUUUUDE russians/swiss people who had no concept of a line and went to bed.

Our Week Vacation in Sri Lanka

I figure a 7 day trip in a country I've never been to, and rarely heard of deserves a blog post with all (or as many as I can remember) the details. I mean how often does one go to Sri Lanka?? Well apparently for Saudis, very frequently; but not for me although I do hope to go back there one day.

So lets just jump in, shall we?

Day 1: Habarna, Sri Lanka

We land in or near Columbo, Sri Lanka, I think the airport is outside of Columbo but not by that much. Anywhoo...we land and collect our luggage and look for the guy who is supposed to be carrying a sign with our names or at least my husband's name on it. There is no one...but this one guy carrying a sign saying "Husain and family" keeps staring at us. I pray that's not him...we call the guy we set up the tour with and he tells us he'll call the guy who will be our guide for the next 7 days. The man holding the Husain sign answers his phone the next second and I think, "Crap, he's our guide." We walk to a kiosk selling phone cards and buy Sri Lankan sim cards so we don't have outrageous bills when we get back to Saudi Arabia. Then we leave the airport, and are greeted by a rush of humidity and heat. YUCK! I feel like I want to cry, humid stickiness is not the vacation I was envisioning. But I decide to ignore and make the best of the sweat I suddenly feel dripping down my back and neck. Thankfully the A/C in the car is amazing, and in no time we are enjoying a ride to our first hotel. Along the way we pick up some coconuts, king coconuts to be exact and drink the coconut water straight from the coconut. Then we buy some lemon bananas. Next we drive through a little town famous for their cashews so of course we buy some cashews from the side of the road. Delicious! We then stop by a wooded area where we see some rubber trees and learn that they actually get rubber from these trees to make shoes and tires and stuff. And here I was thinking rubber tree was just a name! We stop for lunch which wasn't anything amazing or really all that interesting. Get back on the road and drive drive drive...passing by coconut trees, banana trees, pineapple plantations and rice paddies. I already knew this but for those who don't each pineapple plant produces one pineapple, and pineapples do not grow on trees or bushes. Pineapples grow under ground like a root with their leaves popping above the ground. When we think we've finally arrived at the hotel we realize our driver has brought us to a place where we can ride elephants..inside I'm terrified, but I play it cool and act like theres nothing too it. Until of course nearly crying when I actually climb onto the elephant and sit on the little bar/box/death trap thingy on top waiting for my sons and husband to climb in too. Our ride starts through a jungle where residents living there try to sell us bags of bananas (we end up buying two bags) to feed the elephant along the way. You yell "Kumari banana" and all of the sudden the elephants trunk is flung up nearly into the death trap thingy waiting for you to hand her a banana. So you feed her bananas as you ride through the jungle (not a dense jungle but its still called a jungle). Then we start walking towards a little lake/pond/some kind of body of water and the elephant walk in until our feet are practically in the water too. She walks through the water as you observe the water lilies and other plant/animal life as well as the floating mounds of elephant poop :D. Its peaceful and beautiful and you kind of forget how freaking huge the elephant is and how freaking scary it would be if you fell off and were crushed by its ginormous feet. And then she leaves the water and they ask if you want to move onto the elephants neck. My husband and sons all took turns...I chickened out. After the majestic elephant ride we head to the hotel in Habarna and are pleasantly surprised with a really beautiful hotel room with an amazing pool that has water soo warm you'll think an elephant must have peed in it. The boys and I take a swim at night, i love night swimming, and then our day ends with some dinner in the room.

Day 2: Habarna, Sri Lanka

We woke up bright and early the next morning and headed to a jeep for a safari through the jungle. Now mind you, when I first heard Sri Lanka is a jungle...I envisioned dark green everywhere..kind of like Tarzan or something. Its not that dark...or dense. and Tarzan is a cartoon so I probably should not have been comparing real life to a disney movie. :/ oh well. It was still breathtakingly beautiful. Anyways...we start our ride and see a few birds, a peacock..and then the best part wild elephants!!! Be prepared this trip is all about the elephants. :D Its a beautiful ride, so peaceful and not too hot yet since its still pretty early in the morning. You can hear the sounds of the jungle fowl and other jungle animals. We drove past a little creek, and then we stopped at a rock/mountain/hill and got out to climb up. The view? SPECTACULAR! The sounds? Better than any relaxation cd! It was stunning....green everywhere and the sounds of actual nature no car engines to mar the beauty of it all. And on top of this rock there was a kind of hut on stilts that we were able to climb up and get an even higher view of everything. I fell in love, even though I am scared to death of bugs and getting dirty I absolutely love nature. When the safari ended we met our tour guide back at the hotel and he took us for one more elephant ride on Kumari. Then we started our ride towards Kandy but not before stopping for a "Village Tour" which consisted of a bull cart ride to a tuk tuk, a tuk tuk ride to a canoe-type boat, a canoe-type boat ride around a lake, and then a stop in an actual village persons kitchen to see how they do everyday tasks. We watched her clean rice (basically like husking corn), watched how they separated the husk thingies from the rice, watched her grind millet in her house, by hand (everything was done by hand), saw how she opened a coconut in her back yard- basically there is a stick stuck in the ground with a blade on it, and then she smashes the coconut against it to peel it so that she can take it inside to open it. They cover the blade with an old coconut shell "for safety" as she said. Next they take the coconut into the house and grab a knife to split it in half. They pour the water into old coconut shells and drink it (we got to drink it I felt soo awesome lol). Then the break the coconut and start grating out the meat. They eat the meat alone and they also have other uses for the meat. They mix it with water to make coconut milk. Or they use the grated coconut as part of the ingredients for roti (their bread). She made roti for us out of the ground millet, grated coconut, and coconut milk, and a little salt. Then she made something called coconut sambal which was grated coconut, onions, chili, salt, lemon and water. It was sooooooooooo delicious! She also made us a spice tea for after lunch with some fresh fruits. It was amazing to see how far the coconut could go! I mean it served as refreshment, side dish, and main dish, and it was also used as their cups! Resourceful!!!! The last stop of the day was a spice garden where we bought a whole bunch of natural medicinal stuff, and got to see the plants of a lot of spices. It was a beautiful garden and an exhausting yet amazing day! We were very very happy to get to our hotel in Kandy and head to bed to prepare for the next two days there.

Day 3: Kandy, Sri Lanka

We woke up early, again, theres a theme of early rising this entire week because Sri Lanka is a country where everyone goes to bed by 8 pm, and all shops are closed by 7 pm. :| This day we headed to the Pinnawela Elephant Orphanage to see the elephants!! http://www.elephant.se/location2.php?location_id=43 in case you'd like to see pics. So we get there and are able to see the baby elephants being bottle-fed, unfortunately we were not there early enough to actually give them any milk but we were able to feed the bigger elephants some fruit. After watching the milk feeding, and feeding the baby elephants some jack fruit tree leaves, we walked over to the bigger elephants and bought two plates of fruits to feed to the elephants. It was pretty amazing being that close to a huge elephant. Its trunk up in the air and its mouth open ready for the fruit. It just stood there mouth wide and its tongue would push the fruit down its throat. Its mouth didn't close at all...I accidentally touched its tongue which freaked me out..haha but since I did feel it I might as well describe it. it was soooooo smooth and very wet. Not sticky at all as I would have thought. Just very very smooth, soft, and wet. Once we were done with feeding them we watched them roam on the grassland with a beautiful jungle backdrop. I say backdrop because it looked sooo surreal! It didn't seem real...it was so incredibly beautiful! After watching them walk around freely, no glass or bars separating us from them they started their walk to the river for their two hour bath. We walked behind them, able to reach out our hands and touch them, to the river and the watched them bathing, and splashing and drinking the water. Afterwards we walked to a few shops and saw a factory where they take the elephant dung and turn it into paper, natural color and a bunch of other colors. Pretttyyy coool stuff, but definitely not a try it at home kind of thing..unless of course your diet consists of leaves, fruits, and tree trunks. lol Our next stop of the day was a botanical garden...which was beautiful but considering the heat and the fact that there are botanical gardens in the States too I wasn't all that impressed and was really just ready to head back to the hotel and rest! We rested for a couple hours then headed back out to watch a traditional dance which lasted an hour because it was a few different dances plus some fire tricks and fire walking. When that was done we headed back to the Tooth Relic Buddhist Temple and were driving past a lake...over the lake the sky was filled with bats flying over. Now I am definitely scared of a bat flying near me, but it was one of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen. They were so graceful! It was more beautiful than watching birds...maybe because its more rare to see the sky so full of bats (for me anyways). We visited the Tooth relic Buddhist Temple which was very ...loud. They were in the middle of a ceremony or something which is basically loudly beating two or three maybe four drums. I don't know how that can help meditation but there were people meditating. I probably would have yelled for them to shut the hell up! Then after another exhausting day headed back to the hotel in Kandy.

My oldest is the sweetest four year old I know, so so incredibly sweet. This morning his brother wanted his toy, so I asked him to find another toy for his younger brother. He walked his brother out of our bedroom and this was the conversation leaving and coming back,

"Come on, we'll find you another toy."
"Otay"
tiny footsteps running outside, and then coming back in.
"Here let me help you. Here silly let me put the mask on you. Baba, baba look he's batman!"

and earlier in the week we had a flat tire, so my husband called a cab to take the boys and I home (it was their bedtime) and the littlest one laid his head on his older brothers lap, and my sweet little boy, hugged him to him and then rubbed his head. It was the sweetest moment ever.

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My youngest for as long as he could walk and realize that things could be put in pockets has been thinking that his pant leg is his pocket. When it was winter time it worked out fine, since the cuff of his pants would keep whatever he was storing in his "pocket" safe. When summer rolled around he tried putting stuff in his "pocket", but his shorts -- well they have no cuff, so he'd try putting things in his "pocket" and they'd just fall right back out. He would be so frustrated trying to figure out why things would stay in his brothers pocket but not his. Lately, well actually for the past 5-6 months, he has been giving us things from his "pocket". At the play area, while jumping on the trampoline, he'll stop to give me and his dad cotton candy. Sometimes its food...but the past two nights...at bedtime, when we've turned off the lights and have told him and his brother time to sleep, he'll sit up, reach up his pajama pant leg, and tell me, "Here mommy, yucky orange fish." then he'll crawl out of bed, and reach down to give a yucky orange fish to his dad and his older brother. Why on earth he'd think we need a yucky orange fish is beyond me. and why does it have to be yucky?? At first he said orange fish, and so i pretended to eat it and he said no no its yucky orange fish. Kids!

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Bedtime means quiet, silence, sleep. My boys, like most boys, don't seem to understand that. Tonight, my youngest was holding a helicopter toy that has buttons that make real helicopter sounds. He clicked it once, I asked him not to do it again, his reply? "Oh solly"
Then a few minutes later he clicks it again, I tell him again, no clicking the buttons, "Oh solly"
FInally the third time I take it away, and he cries and promises he won't do it again. So I give it back...and not two seconds of having it he clicks the button and immediately says, "Oh solly" Needless to say I took it away, but not before laughing. I couldn't help it...it was soooo soooo funny!

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Yesterday during bedtime rituals I was helping to get my boys ready, when my four year old suddenly tells me, "thank you mommy, for not letting me sneeze." Knowing me and my family, we are very very sarcastic. So my first reaction was omg he's being sarcastic..but then he followed up with, "I mean that nicely mommy." which melted my heart but also made me feel a sort of pride that he can differentiate and understand the difference between sarcasm and well everything else. and the back story behind the sneeze is if I feel a sneeze coming on and someone so much as breathes loudly it will go away and I get REALLY annoyed. Apparently my boys have inherited that, and he was happy not to be sneezing because he had just sneezed three times before (he has a cold :( poor baby!)