Turning 27

So I was just getting ready to head to bed, when I hear a horrible crash, bang, thud...and then the sound of my four year old screaming out in pain. I rush to see blood dripping from his mouth...his nose all over the bedroom floor. I grab a washcloth and start dabbing his nose and applying slight pressure....no looking up or down for me. I'm a firm believer of not doing either..back will just make it pool inside and down won't do anything special.

I check his teeth, his tongue, his mouth, lips and nose for any serious injuries...al7mdulila there did not seem to be any. I check the rest of his head for any gashes or cuts that might need stitches...nothing thank god!

I try to keep him awake....scared of him getting a concussion or something. But he falls asleep and I worry if thats a bad sign. Then again is 2:20 am and any four year old would be falling asleep at this time. Bloody nose or not.

*sigh* being a mom is full of worries, stress and guilt.

I now have a mountain of pillows and comforters on his side of the bed so if he rolls off of bed again he won't hurt himself too badly...i hope.

He never falls out of bed at home...NEVER. But this mattress we're currently sleeping on..we're on summer vacation...is not the best mattress. It's a very cheap...i know that may sound snobbish..spring mattress. Even I almost fell out of bed twice already in the past two nights. I love laying on the edge and apparently my four year old does too. However with this mattress when you lay on the edge...it slants and creates a ramp that slowly slides you out of bed. I don't know if this is normal....but no other mattress I have slept on in the past 6 years has done that.

And since I have no one to blame I am blaming the mattress. But not without good reason...it really is an awful mattress.

And because when something bad happens you can't help but think of all the other things annoying you because obviously you need to be as miserable as possible...I am turning 27 on the 27th. My golden birthday..I wanted to do something special...a family lunch. But looks like thats not going to happen. First the country decides to change its weekend and make it effective two days after my birthday. Which means confusion and chaos the weekend of my birthday. Plus my dad decided that this would be the perfect time for a road trip...I don't want to, nor can I take a road trip. The road trip isn't for sure yet...but it might as well be. So I'm disappointed. yet again. I should be used to it though. The only good birthday I can remember having was when I finished 6th grade. I had a nice party with a few friends but even that was slightly disappointing seeing as the majority of people I invited ended up going to an end of the school year party set for the same day as my birthday by a more popular girl. But this was also the summer we drove across country and every stop I seemed to be able to get a birthday present. I don't think it really counts though since my sisters got to pick up a souvenir too at every stop. :/

Majority of my birthdays have been spent on an airplane. so i should be used to it by now. but i'm not. and i wanted something special this year...i really really did. for some reason my brain feels like 27 is a huge milestone. and i think i just wanted one day to be for me...to be about me. just one.

Letting out my frustrations..

Family is funny.. extended family that is, You can go an entire year or more hating them...dreading having to see them. Wishing they didn't exist..but then when you do meet up..feel happy that you have them. Today we met up with my aunt and her family and her new grandson...who is absolutely adorable mashallah!! And I was dreading it...dreading the lectures....the awkwardness...just all of it. But it was really nice..even though we didn't eat until 2 and I had a really light breakfast at 7 am, and when we did eat all they gave us was pizza. :| I understand my aunt can't cook because of her broken foot...but there are other things they could have brought other than pizza. Bleh!

I have to say....food wise..this vacation has not been good. It's been filled with cheese quesadillas and really gross leftover rice. :/ and now pizza oh well...thank god we have food to eat.


I still felt really happy and thankful and just so grateful for family. So grateful to have such an annoying clan who, though they can be annoying, rude, and sometimes mean, will always be there for me.

Anyways...while we were there, my sons started to get a little bored. My mom mentions that she brought some coloring books for them and asked if I'd like to give them to the boys now. I was thrilled! So we pull them out and they were really cool. I don't know if anyone remembers those water color books? The ones that had "magic pages" and all you needed was water and a paint brush??? Well these books were like that, except they had one of those magic markers with magic ink. Invisible on everything except the paper, and each section of the paper was a different color once you colored it. It was really cool! My two year old loved it..because he just scribbled away and was thrilled to see that his scribbling resulted in a beautiful picture. My four year old sat there for literally 2 hours coloring page after page after page. He was very precise, and made sure he was coloring inside the lines even though it didn't really matter much :D My brothers watched my boys color their first pages and then looked over to my mom and said.."did you buy any for us?" My mom and I looked at each other and were kind of shocked. They are 12 and 11...the 12 year old is headed to middle school. When my mom answered no...they both sulked and were really upset. The 12 year old kept telling my mom I cannot believe you didn't buy me one. The booklet says 3 and up....when my mom read that she laughed and said I guess they were serious about the up part.

Then the nanny brought out a bag of toys for my cousin's son who is one...so its a bunch of baby toys. My two year old who is still interested in baby toys...sometimes..was playing with the baby. My 11 year old brother grabs a toy and my son asks him if he can play with it. I feel like a normal response would be  to give the two year old the baby toy or start a game with the child. Instead he insists he was playing with the toy first and he shouldn't have to give it to the now crying two year old...or start a game with him. I mean seriously!?

This has become a venting post...so I might as well vent more frustrations towards this particular topic. My brothers and sons all wanted to box...and there are only two sets of boxing gloves. I suggested that each one gets one glove that way everyone can play. They were all playing fine and laughing...when suddenly my older son comes out on the verge of tears wearing no gloves. My younger brother follows him wearing both gloves. I quickly ask what is happening and he says that the older one of my younger brothers said, "It's not fair because I can't hit him hard so lets play by ourselves." In the middle of them playing..all of them together...nicely....laughing, having fun. And this is a constant theme with the 12 year old. He cannot for the life of him play nicely with younger kids. When he suggests they all play soccer he will take this as a time to show off his tricks and takes the game way to seriously. He has no idea how to interact with younger children.

Then theres the drama of every "injury" they get. I'm sorry but I'm  pretty sure a barefot two year old walking over your foot, by accident, does not warrant you collapsing to the floor grabbing your foot, gasping and informing everyone that your foot was just stepped on. Really? You are three times his size, 6 times his age, and he had no shoes on. You are going to seriously try and tell me that him walking over your foot caused you to have a limp?

Another incident. My youngest brother calls to me in a very annoyed voice, "Tell your son to stop stepping on my shoes, he's ruining them." When you hear that you assume that it must be something important...some kind of special shoe that will be deformed or ruined beyond repair by my two year old stomping all over it. So I ask him trying to stay as calm as possible what shoe my son is destroying. His answer??
"My flip flops." oh.my.god.

Even my dad...who really tries to take my brothers side burst out laughing at how ridiculous that was. Then my brother continues with, "You are going to owe me new flip flops if he ruins them."

What are you even supposed to say to that?!

Last but not least...and actually not really even last I'm just through with venting..is the incessant tattling and stupid stupid back handed comments. They are driving me insane! I'm dealing with a new phase of tattling with my 4 year old which I am hoping he will outgrow but looking at my brothers it seems that may not be likely. My god they tattle more than my four year old. " H did this to O" "O did this to H" and I'm just like...if they don't have a problem with it then I don't need to know!!!

I seem to remember being great with kids at age 12...and so were my sisters...well at least one of them. Maybe my memory is foggy....maybe its just true what they say...girls mature faster than boys. But whatever the hell it is...I am incredibly frustrated and really thinking that maybe an almost 3 month vacation with them was a horrible horrible idea. :|

Then there are the moments when they all play nicely and I'm like ok...why can't you be this way all the time?

In other news....I will be 27 in 3 days...less than 3 since its currently 11:35pm right now. Insane!!!!

Every summer or really anytime I get together with my family I always have my expectations crushed. I always expect this wonderful gathering, my brothers and sons playing nicely together..but that never happens. Instead its filled with my brothers crying. My brothers are 11 and 12...my sons 4 and 2.

Its the most ridiculous thing ever! Like seriously ridiculous....and it drives me insane. and I have no idea why I'm so surprised every time it happens.

You would think an 11 and 12 year old would be able to play nicely with two preschoolers, be old enough to have the understanding towards them that older people have. But nope!

Instead they use them as scape goats...blame EVERYTHING on them..even things that were not their fault.