This past month many of my worlds have been colliding. Everyone seems to know everyone else...and that makes me want to sit huddled in a corner, hiding. I still remember the first time I realized how small the world is. I had just moved to Saudi Arabia, left my American world and friends behind and started at a new school. A few weeks in we were getting a new student...turned out to be a girl who went t my school in the states. Imagine my surprise! I was amazed..and thought it the coolest thing in the world. Then a few weeks later we realized a girl in our class was related to one of our mutual friends in America...again amazed!! Then a few months later one of my friends was showing me family pictures and I recognized a girl to be one of my younger sisters friends from the States. Turns out that was my friends cousin.
I held onto this story, and told it over and over again to anyone who would listen. It was my favorite story to tell, because I thought it was simply amazing.
So as I was saying lately this has been happening again..people I know suddenly knowing other people I know. This time around I don't find the smallness of the world amazing or cool...I find it suffocating, stifling, heart breaking.
I find myself having trouble breathing..feeling perpetually panicked..and I realize its because I keep thinking about how small this world is. I blame globalization, screw those people who came up with it. Everyone should have just stayed within their borders and minded their own business. Oblivious to what was happening in the world around them...that's the world I want to live in. Where there is no risk of my American friends knowing my Saudi friends. And when you travel, no one will ever hear from you again; unless you travel back or write a letter. I also hate technology. I always wanted to live in Jane Austen's time period...be Elizabeth Bennett, but I felt I could never survive without technology.
Technology, along with the shrinking world we live in, has been adding to the suffocating feeling. I hate it, so yes please send me back to a time where facebook, email, and whats app did not exist. Where instagram and its taunting pictures are not even an idea yet.
Then again, I think its age that makes the world shrink. Age and awareness or something like that. Which makes me come to the conclusion that death is indeed a blessing...however it can't come soon enough. First you must be tormented by life, until you are not merely wishing, but begging on your hands and knees for yours to be taken away.
This post was inspired by this random thought I had, and whats apped to my sis: As I age, the world which seemed big, intimidating, and full of hope begins to shrink.With each passing day, it shrinks more and more and I am finding it harder and harder to breathe. The world shrinks and I slowly suffocate...death is a mercy for people unable to cope in this shrinking world. Yet even death cannot come quick enough.
I held onto this story, and told it over and over again to anyone who would listen. It was my favorite story to tell, because I thought it was simply amazing.
So as I was saying lately this has been happening again..people I know suddenly knowing other people I know. This time around I don't find the smallness of the world amazing or cool...I find it suffocating, stifling, heart breaking.
I find myself having trouble breathing..feeling perpetually panicked..and I realize its because I keep thinking about how small this world is. I blame globalization, screw those people who came up with it. Everyone should have just stayed within their borders and minded their own business. Oblivious to what was happening in the world around them...that's the world I want to live in. Where there is no risk of my American friends knowing my Saudi friends. And when you travel, no one will ever hear from you again; unless you travel back or write a letter. I also hate technology. I always wanted to live in Jane Austen's time period...be Elizabeth Bennett, but I felt I could never survive without technology.
Technology, along with the shrinking world we live in, has been adding to the suffocating feeling. I hate it, so yes please send me back to a time where facebook, email, and whats app did not exist. Where instagram and its taunting pictures are not even an idea yet.
Then again, I think its age that makes the world shrink. Age and awareness or something like that. Which makes me come to the conclusion that death is indeed a blessing...however it can't come soon enough. First you must be tormented by life, until you are not merely wishing, but begging on your hands and knees for yours to be taken away.
This post was inspired by this random thought I had, and whats apped to my sis: As I age, the world which seemed big, intimidating, and full of hope begins to shrink.With each passing day, it shrinks more and more and I am finding it harder and harder to breathe. The world shrinks and I slowly suffocate...death is a mercy for people unable to cope in this shrinking world. Yet even death cannot come quick enough.
